Flying Kick-a-pow!

After spending a long time in a mental health facility, Pat Peoples returns home and is ready to get his life back together. Pat is convinced that his destiny is to become more physically fit and to read more classic literature so that his estranged wife Nikki will come back to him. But now that he's at home, things aren't quite right. His family refuses to talk about his wife, his favorite football team (the Philadelphia Eagles) keeps losing games, and now a strange woman named Tiffany is starting to show interest in him …This is one of the rare cases in which I saw the movie before reading the book. It's also one of the rare cases in which I think the movie did a better job with a lot of aspects of the story … but more on that later.I see I'm not the only person who thought of this book as kind of being an adult version of The Perks of Being a Wallflower. The narration was very similar, I thought––very simple and to-the-point, with a lot of little philosophical tidbits frequently thrown in. And it deals with some of the same issues––particularly mental health. (The stories are quite different, though.)For the most part, I thought it worked … but there were times when I was kind of confused by the structure of the narration. I think it was mentioned a few times that Pat was writing this story down, like a journal type of thing. But then a lot of it was in present tense, which felt kind of odd for a journal format. And … I don't know. It was just unclear for me.I liked the story for the most part. I think there's an important message about how things don't always turn out the way we anticipated, and sometimes it's better to just let things fall into place rather than to fight to get to an implausible goal. There are numerous "happy endings" that could happen, and not all of them are what we expect. However, there were some things in the execution of the story that bothered me.Probably the biggest problem for me was that I didn't feel most of the characters were very strong. Pat has a distinctive narrating voice and is a pretty good character over all … but I didn't feel like anyone else in the book was that interesting or memorable. (I don't want to constantly compare the book to the movie, but I felt the movie did a better job of characterizing everyone, even the minor characters. I thought Tiffany in particular was a much stronger character in the film.)There were also a lot of little "quirks" that I just didn't like. For one, I got kind of tired of Pat constantly talking about how he thinks of his life as being a movie. It's the kind of thing that could have just been mentioned once and that would've been fine. But the constant "my life is a movie, my life is a movie" got pretty annoying for me.Also, there was Pat's tendency to keep mentioning his (token black) friend Danny in a kind of … offensive manner. For example:"He is also wearing a watch with diamonds all over the face, which Danny would call Jake's bling-bling."… *Cringe*There was also a point in the book where the narration was written in letters, which might have been okay if it had just been like, two or three letters … but it was like, ten. And that got rather tiresome in my opinion.Also, I really hate football so … the numerous football parts were very boring for me.But other than that, I thought this book was a fairly good read. I didn't think it was amazing, but it wasn't bad either. It's not executed perfectly, but it's a cute story.Anyway, I think the book and movie are both worth experiencing. (But unlike me, you should all probably read it before watching it … haha.)

The Forever Song?THIS IS THE SONG THAT NEVER ENDS, YES IT GOES ON AND ON MY FRIENDS, SOME PEOPLE STARTED SINGING IT NOT KNOWING WHAT IT WAS, AND THEY'LL CONTINUE SINGING IT FOREVER JUST BECAUSE THIS IS THE SONG THAT NEVER ENDS, YES IT GOES ON AND ON MY FRIENDS ....

Oh man, this sounds really badass.

“This is not a test. Listen closely. This is not a test."But I think she's wrong. I think this is a test.It has to be.It’s the end of the world, and Sloane Price is trapped in an abandoned high school with five other teenagers. Meanwhile, the walking dead wait outside, trying to break down the doors. A single bite from one of these creatures will turn you into a monster––into one of them. Sloane's world already ended six months ago, when her older sister left her behind with their abusive father. It seems like, out of the six people in the group, Sloane is the only one who doesn't want to live. But she has no choice but to watch the apocalypse unfold, and observe how her companions' motivations for survival shift and change as the days pass.I understand what Courtney Summers wanted to accomplish with this novel, and I think it's an interesting take on the zombie story. Most zombie books go straight for the blood-and-guts, the action sequences, and so on. This is Not a Test focuses less on the action and more on the psychological aspect of the apocalypse. It gives a possibly more realistic perspective on what would happen if there was a zombie attack––people would just wait around and hope it would pass, and eventually the waiting would drive them crazy.However, even though I liked the idea of a more psychological zombie novel, it just didn't work for me. Probably my biggest problem was that I felt little to no connection with the characters in this book. The idea would have worked a lot better for me had the characters been more fleshed-out and distinguishable from each other. As it was, I couldn't even keep track of who was who for about the entire first half of the novel. I knew who Sloane and Grace were, because they were the only girls. But the four boys were almost impossible for me to tell apart from each other. I swear, there was one of them who was barely even mentioned until like halfway through the book … and then I was like, "Wait … who the hell is that?" And then there was Sloane … jeez. I had a really hard time sympathizing with her. I understood she was depressed and everything, and I would be too if I was waiting around in an abandoned school waiting to die. But I mean, all she ever talked about was how she was so sad and wanted to kill herself. She was just so damn hopeless and it made it difficult for me to care what happened to her. It was like … if the main character doesn't give a crap about what happens, why on earth should I? She was just so doom-and-gloom like, "Nothing matters. We're all going to diiiiie. I might as well just go outside and let the zombies eat me, mehh mehhh." So … I got pretty tired of her.There was also the fact that hardly anything happens in this book. It's literally just a story about a bunch of kids sitting around in a school while the zombie apocalypse is going on outside. I thought that at some point they'd, you know, leave the school. But then about halfway through the book, when they were still in the same place as the beginning, I was like, "Oh geez, they're just going to be in this school the whole book, aren't they?" I've seen a lot of reviewers saying how this is not a "zombie book," just a "book with zombies in it." And yeah, that pretty much sums it up. This is not really a zombie book. It's actually just a more depressing and less entertaining version of The Breakfast Club. And you know the scene at the end of that movie where they all confess why they're in detention and they all end up crying and screaming at each other? That's essentially what this entire book is like. It's like that climatic scene over and over again for 300 pages. So yeah, you take The Breakfast Club and you take out all the humor and multiply the angst by a thousand, and then you add in some zombies that aren't really all that relevant … and you have the plot of this book.In the end, I just got pretty bored and frustrated with this novel. I was intrigued by the concept and I wanted to like it, but it just didn't reach its potential for me. I felt it was melodramatic and repetitive and it just couldn't hold my interest. And in the end, it was so devoid of hope that it felt pointless to me.I mean, basically everyone just randomly dies at the end. Soooo. Yeah.I liked Summers's writing style enough that I'd be interested in trying her other books. But unfortunately, this one just wasn't my cup of tea.

Thank you Karen for providing me with an ARC of this book!Edit: I've decided to bump this down to 3 stars. This was one of those books that I liked more at the time I was reading it, but after digesting it for a while, I realize that it just didn't stick with me. And after thinking about it and reading a bunch of other reviews, I don't think this deserves more than 3 stars (I originally had it at 3.5.) Rick Yancey, you're awesome and the Monstrumologist books are the bomb, but ... sorry, this one disappointed me.On to the original review: I wanted to love this book. I really did. When I first found out about it, I totally lost my shit. (You can see this for yourself in my pre-review rants, posted at the bottom of this review.) I mean, I adore Rick Yancey. And I'd been craving a good YA alien book, because I haven't read many that I liked.I really love Rick Yancey's Monstrumologist series––I read the first three books in a span of like three or four days (the fourth book hasn't come out yet), which is something I never do with series (read the books all in a row like that, I mean). I just find that series to be so exciting and innovative, and unlike any other YA series I've read before, in a lot of ways.Thus, when I heard about The 5th Wave, that's what I expected it to be: innovative. Different. Creative. I expected something on the level of my other favorite YA dystopian series, like the Chaos Walking trilogy by Patrick Ness or Angelfall by Susan Ee. Unfortunately, this book just did not meet my super-high expectations. Maybe it's because I expected too much of it, but I found it a bit disappointing. While I liked it, it just wasn't quite what I wanted it to be, and my opinion, it was pretty clichéd.Basically, the story is about a future, post-apocalyptic world in which most of the human race has been wiped out by aliens. Cassie is on the run from them, trying to survive on her own. She's also on a mission to find her brother, who was taken away from her by a suspicious group of soldiers. She soon meets Evan Walker, a boy who seems trustworthy––but can Cassie really trust anyone in a world of aliens disguised as human beings? In a second storyline, a teenage boy nicknamed Zombie is captured and taken to a mysterious army base where he is trained to be a soldier … but he soon begins to discover that things are not what they may seem, and that he might be fighting on the wrong side.Over all, I thought the book was pretty fun and addicting for the most part. It's fast-paced, has a lot of action, etc. And that's pretty much what it has going for it. It's the type of stuff that's perfect for an action-movie adaptation … and I have a sneaking suspicion that's the reason it exists in the first place. (After all, the book already has a movie deal and a $750,000 marketing campaign … holy shit.) I mean, for the most part it was pretty well-written. The style has a lot of personality, humor, etc. It just didn't capture me quite as much as the Monstrumologist books did. Probably the biggest problem for me, though, was that I just didn't feel much of a connection to any of the characters. I was pretty disappointed in Cassie. When I first read the description of the book, I was psyched … I mean, I expected to get a really kickass female protagonist. But, don't be fooled. The summary of the book is super misleading. The weird thing about it is that it doesn't mention Zombie at all … and actually, I felt he was more of a protagonist than Cassie was. I was pretty confused when it suddenly switched to another point of view besides Cassie's. I figured it out pretty quickly, but still … It was just a bit jarring, since the summary of the book doesn't even mention there being a second narrator. And from there, Zombie's narration kind of took over the book, and really it was the more significant half of the plot. Cassie's point of view ended up being pretty … well, boring really. For a majority of the book, she was sitting around in a house with Evan and couldn't move anywhere because of a leg wound. It wasn't until towards the end of the book that she really did anything. And really, I didn't care much about Cassie and Evan's romance; it felt forced to me and it was hardly fleshed-out at all. Her dedication to her little brother is realistic and endearing, but that's pretty much her only strong character trait. Zombie was a slightly more interesting and likable character. (I think Rick Yancey is more convincing at writing from a male point of view than from a female point of view.) But still, I didn't find him to be particularly memorable. There were also some plot twists that were pretty predictable.The whole thing where the child soldiers were actually being trained by aliens to kill humans … Well, I guess we kind of knew that from the beginning. But still, it just felt kind of obvious and expected to me.And then, Evan being an alien … surprise, surprise. Forbidden romance and all that. It's just been done a billion times before. If I need cheesy alien-human romance, I'll go watch "Roswell." Lulz.Anyway, at the risk of sounding like a total hipster, this book just felt like it was trying to go super mainstream. And what with the gigantic marketing campaign, that seems to be the case. Not to make assumptions, but I feel like Rick Yancey genuinely wanted to write the Monstrumologist books, while The 5th Wave felt like something someone paid him to write. It's not a terrible book … it just doesn't have a lot of soul, in my opinion. I'll probably give the sequel a chance, though, because I could see this series potentially getting better as it goes along. And the first book was at least exciting and compelling enough to keep me going.--------------------Pre-review rants under the spoiler:Update (4/18/13): YAY I'M GETTING AN ARC OF THIS AFTER ALL! Thanks, Karen! :D--------------------3/7/13:So, I didn't win an ARC of this.And on NetGalley they're only giving it away to Australian reviewers. Seriously, if someone has an ARC of this that they don't want/need could you just send it to me? Like, ACTUALLY. I am a million percent serious. ----------2/26/13:OH MY GOD, WHY HAVE I NOT EVEN HEARD OF THIS BOOK UNTIL TODAY?!RICK YANCEY. ALIENS. WHAT. I ... I CAN'T EVEN. I'M SO EXCITED, YOU HAVE NO IDEA.Okay, so I LOVE the Monstrumologist series. I finally got around to reading them this past summer, and I devoured all three books back-to-back, within a single week. They were that good. They're like some kind of terrifying supernatural Sherlock Holmes and they're so freaking awesome. And so the fourth book isn't coming out until September, which sucks. But now I hear that I still get a new Rick Yancey book in the next few months. YAAAAYYYY. And it's about ALIENS.I was seriously thinking like two days ago about how there aren't enough good YA alien books. There's of course the beautiful Chaos Walking series, but other than that I have trouble thinking of any (and if I can, there aren't a lot that I actually liked). So yeah, recently I've been thinking "DAMN I NEED MORE ALIEN BOOKS." I think the universe is rewarding me.On top of that, advance reviews for this book make it sound really promising. Like, REALLY really. I see that Wendy Darling has boldly predicted that it could be the next Hunger Games-esque phenomenon, and Melissa Marr said it was "one of the best books [she's] read in years." So ... holy shit. I'm psyched. PLEASE LET ME GET AN ARC OF THIS. OH PLEASE OH PLEASE.

I always loved fairytales when I was a little kid––and no, not the silly watered-down ones. I liked the real, hardcore shit. The fairytales where everyone dies. Those are the good ones. Those Disney princess movies always bored me. (Except I loved Beauty and the Beast, because Belle isn't a dumbass and she reads a lot––like meeee!)Anyway, if I recall correctly, I had at least one of Andrew Lang's fairytale collections when I was a kid … maybe a couple of them. Then, this past month, I had an assignment for my drawing class to illustrate a story. I immediately started remembering all these crazy fairytales I had read as a kid, and started to look them up. I stumbled upon Lang's collections again, and discovered that they were available on Amazon as free ebooks! Yay! So naturally, I downloaded them all (I think there were only two that weren't free on Amazon, but those two were free on Project Gutenberg, SOOO.)(Side note: I ended up illustrating a Norwegian fairytale called "East of the Sun, West of the Moon" and you can see my illustrations here.)Anyway, I got caught up in reading these fairytales and read the whole Blue Fairy Book. There were a lot of fairytales I'd forgotten and remembered again, some I'd never heard of, and a lot that I'd heard before but which were different versions than what I was familiar with.For example … DID YOU KNOW there's a version of Sleeping Beauty in which, after they get married and all that jazz, the prince's mother is an evil ogress who tries to eat Sleeping Beauty and her children? True facts! Oh, and then she makes this giant pot of like snakes and crocodiles and shit that she's going to put Sleeping Beauty and the kids into, and then the prince walks in and he's like, "Mom, what the fuck are you doing?" and she's like "Uh … um … How do I cover this up." So she just jumps into the pot herself and gets eaten alive. Yup.Anyway, a lot of these fairytales just had total WTF moments."The first thing she did when she reached her room was to throw the cabbage out of the window. But she was very much surprised to hear an odd little voice cry out: "Oh! I am half killed!" and could no tell where it came from, because cabbages do not generally speak."… Like that.Also sometimes the old timey language could have some hilarious results."There was a miller who left no more estate to the three sons he had than his mill, his ass, and his cat.""Here, son. You get my cat. Other son, here's my mill. And third son … you just get MY ASS.""Oh, thanks Dad."HOHOHO.Also, of course, the word "gay" had a different connotation back then.- "He was young, and gay, and handsome …"- "Then he dressed himself carefully in rich brocade, with scarlet and white plumes, and threw a splendid embroidered scarf over his shoulder, and, looking as gay and as graceful as possible, he presented himself at the door of the palace …"Ha. Haha. Anyway …There are some pretty sexist moments. I guess that's to be expected because of the time period in which these stories were created. But still."She fainted away, for this is the first expedient almost all women find in such cases."And a lot of super violent things just happen out of the blue."She had picked up a knife and cut her head off in an instant."Oh yeah, also for some reason the first five chapters of Gulliver's Travels were in this book. And I'm like … uh, that's not a fairytale. So. What the hell. Also the Greek myth about Perseus was in here, except all the names were changed. So that was odd.Anyway … the point is, fairytales are crazy and weird and I love them. The end.

Thank you NetGalley for providing me with an ARC of this book!Actual rating: 2.5 starsMost of the world has become a wasteland. The world is in need of a new generation of leaders to piece society back together. But in order to become part of this group of future leaders, a select few teens are required to pass the Testing. Cia Vale is thrilled when she is selected as a candidate for the Testing. But before she leaves, her father––a former participant of the Testing––gives her an ominous warning, hinting that there is a very dark side to the test she is about to take. Above all, he makes one thing clear: she can't trust anyone.When the Testing begins, Cia discovers that her father was right. It's every man for himself, and it soon becomes clear that the other candidates are willing to stab each other in the back in order to pass. … And failing has more dire consequences than Cia anticipated. Over all, this book was very "meh" for me. It wasn't terrible, but there wasn't much to distinguish it from other YA dystopian books. It seemed like it was just borrowing elements from other dystopian books and didn't have much to offer in terms of originality. (I mean, just look at it … even the cover is a pretty blatant rip-off of the Hunger Games covers; same with the chapter headings.)I found the first half of the book pretty dull. It mostly consists of a bunch of kids sitting around taking tests (like, you know, pencil and paper tests). It gradually builds up to more threatening tests, in which a person or two dies a horrible death for giving a wrong answer or making a wrong move, etc. But … it's still kind of like "extreme SATs" or something. The pace doesn't pick up until about halfway through the book, in which the final test consists of the characters being dropped off in a random place, and they have to find their way back to the starting point. (And they're allowed to kill each other along the way, of course.) But even with the rise in action, the second half of the book is pretty repetitive and I didn't find it too engaging.Cia is not a very strong protagonist, either, and she's pretty much just a Mary Sue. She's super smart, and she tends to antagonize all the other characters and make them sound like inhuman, unfeeling beings. She has kind of a "everyone is a shallow jerk except for me" attitude. The rest of the characters weren't very interesting or relatable to me, either. They were all pretty bland and didn't have very strong motives or personalities. There's also a romance, but it's not very well-developed or believable. It felt forced to me. Also, the writing is pretty "telling" rather than showing. There's a lot of plot summary, and the author tends to skim over dialogue by writing things like, "First we talked about this thing, then we talked about another thing. Then we talked about the other thing some more." It's like … I don't want to just hear what you talked about, I want to know what the characters actually said. Skipping over the dialogue like that is boring, and it also detracts from the character development. I think there are some interesting themes in the book, and some interesting social/political messages about what it takes to be a leader––whether leaders should be ruthless or compassionate, and so on. And the story did have its exciting bits.But, ultimately, it just didn't completely hold my attention and it wasn't original enough to be very memorable for me, and it wasn't enough for me to want to continue the series.

Thank you NetGalley for providing me with a copy of this book!Note: Just to avoid any confusion, this book was originally published under the title Eden and was republished in March 2013 under the title The Bane.In the future, a technology called TorBane––a combination of human DNA and cybernetic matter––is able to fix all medical problems, from curing diseases to regenerating organs and limbs. But then the cybertechnology goes out of control, and starts taking over people's bodies and minds until they become half human and half machine––transforming into beings who become known as the Bane.Although she knows the story well, Eve doesn't remember any of this happening. She doesn't recall anything before she stumbled into Eden––a colony of survivors. Since then, she has become a strong fighter among them. But when a stranger named West arrives in Eden, Eve soon begins to discover secrets about her past that will make her question everything she thought she knew.Over all, I found The Bane to be an addicting read. I don't think it was particularly memorable or thought-provoking, but it was at least fun for the most part. I struggled a bit through maybe the last fourth of it or so, but most of the time it kept me interested.I thought the concept of this book was intriguing; it's an interesting spin on the zombie novel. The Bane are somewhat similar to the concept of zombies, in that they're mindless humanoid creatures that have taken over the world. But it's interesting that instead of being the typical "walking dead," they're evil cyborgs instead. Although zombies and cyborgs are both pretty common in sci-fi, I'd never really seen the two things combined before. I don't think the idea of TorBane was very believable or scientifically possible, but at least the idea was interesting.The plot was also pretty exciting and had some twists I didn't expect. The pacing was a little choppy, especially in the beginning, but I thought it got better as it went along.The characters in this book fell flat for me, however.Eve was a tolerable protagonist at least, but kind of a Mary Sue––she was basically just good at everything. I'm rather tired of seeing these YA female protagonists that are passed off as being "badass" just because they're great at beating people up. There has to be more to a character than that. (Not to mention, her name is not very subtle … I mean, Eve … in Eden. Oy vey.) I had mixed feelings about her turning out to be a Bane. There were some hints of her starting to lose her mind from it of course, but she was sane most of the time which seemed kind of … too convenient.The two love interests, West and Avian, are pretty generic. Avian is the "best friend guy who's always been there for the girl" and West is the typical "mysterious stranger bad boy." And there's not much to distinguish them from each other personality-wise. I was also not happy about how the love triangle was "resolved" in the end. It seemed like Eve was just like, "You know what, I decided I just love Avian. So yeah." There wasn't really any reason why she spontaneously decided this.In the end, I found The Bane to be mostly entertaining, but I didn't feel as much of a connection to the characters as I'd hoped I would. I liked it enough to possibly read the sequels, but it's not at the top of my priorities list.

I'm not going to touch this due to sexism, slut-shaming, and poor representation of feminism. (See other reviews for details.) The cover is pretty, though. I'll give it that.

I tried to read this a long time ago and never finished it. So, I'm going to attempt to read it again. Yay! :D

Actual rating: 2.5 stars"A story needs to be told. A story must be told. How else can we live in this world that makes no sense?"One night, George Duncan is woken up by a strange keening noise in his backyard. Upon going outside, he finds a crane with an arrow through its wing. George helps the crane and sets it free––and from there, his life changes.The next day, George meets a mysterious woman named Kumiko. The two of them begin creating beautiful art pieces out of old books, and soon fall in love. But Kumiko seems to be hiding things, and something about her is almost otherworldly, maybe even inhuman …Let's get one thing straight right now. I have no doubt that Patrick Ness can write an amazing book. His Chaos Walking trilogy is hands-down my favorite series ever, and his book A Monster Calls is one of the most beautiful YA novels I've ever read. Few books have moved me the way his books have, and he is one of my all-time favorite authors. I hope that one day I will meet him. And hug him. And probably cry.That said, I was a bit nervous about him writing a book for adults––but like I said, he's one of my favorite authors, so I tried to go into this book with an open mind. After all, I do really like fantasy realism and mythology and all that jazz.But after reading this book … all I can really say is: Patrick Ness, please stick to writing YA. Please, please, please.Don't get me wrong. The Crane Wife isn't a terrible book. It's good. But that's all it is. It's just … good. Fine. Whatever. It's an intriguing story, and it's pretty well-written for the most part. But I didn't find anything particularly remarkable about it. The strong sense of voice, the high levels of emotion, the excitement, and the relatable characters that are so present in the Chaos Walking books just aren't present in this novel.I liked the premise of this book. That's … about it, really.I found the characters to be pretty dull and lacking in distinctive qualities. I just didn't care about any of them. They were all just "ordinary" people (well, except Kumiko I guess … but even she wasn't that interesting). Not much happens in the book. Besides the little hints of mysticism here and there, mostly it was just kind of about people living their daily lives. I never thought I would say this about a book by Patrick Ness, but … honestly, I got bored.The writing was all right. Just all right. Which kills me, because I think Patrick Ness is a truly brilliant writer. But the style felt so forced in this book. I think this is why I tend to stick to reading YA books rather than reading adult books … There tends to be this sense in adult books to impress the audience, and so the author's voice doesn't feel completely authentic. The style in Ness's Chaos Walking series is so innovative and gives the narrating characters such strong voices. The voice was really lacking in The Crane Wife for me. It felt to me like Ness was holding back, not writing in his usual creative style … not to make assumptions, but maybe because he finds it more intimidating to write for adults than to write for teenagers. Over all, I just felt that there was no passion in this book. While Patrick Ness's other books made me extremely emotional, I felt next to nothing while reading this novel. It was a fairly good read, but it just wasn't that good or that memorable. I know that Patrick Ness has another YA book coming out in the fall called More Than This, which sounds like it will be really good. And I just hope he keeps writing YA books, because I think that's where his strength is.

This can't be serious. Please, someone tell me this is a joke. Inner Goddess Journal features a foreword by E L James, memorable excerpts from the novels, tips for writers, a writing playlist, elegant color artwork, and fully lined pages throughout.Memorable excerpts? I mean, if you must, you could just read the freaking book.Writing playlist? Uh ... that's what blogs are for.Elegant color artwork and fully lined pages: Oh boy! Tips for writers: ...TIPS FOR WRITERS.TIPS FOR WRITERS.I don't know whether to laugh or cry. I mean ... I can only imagine."Dear reader, if you want to be a bestselling author like me, all you have to do is take a popular Young Adult novel and morph it into an adult BDSM fanfiction where you blatantly rip off the original but just change all the characters' names. Oh, and make sure to follow every single sentence with, 'Holy shit!', 'Holy fuck!', 'Holy crap!', or 'Oh my!'" But hey! It worked for her and now she has a crapload of money. So ... yeah. Great."Perfect for gift-giving and portability."Hey look what I got you for Christmas, Grandma!Also ... aren't most books "perfect for portability"? I mean, that's kind of the point, unless it's a freaking dictionary or something.UNIT AUTOMATICALLY BECOMES PORTABLE WHEN CARRIED.

Ready Player One was a pleasant surprise for me. I probably wouldn't have picked it up on my own, and it's not the kind of thing I typically read … but fortunately, it was a book club read for one of my Goodreads groups, and because of that I picked it up and ultimately really enjoyed it.The story is about a future society in which everyone is dependent upon a virtual reality world called the OASIS. People spend immense amounts of time in this virtual reality, using it for various purposes––from playing games, to hanging out with people, to going to virtual school. (It's a bit like the Japanese film Summer Wars.)The man who created the OASIS––named James Halliday––has died, and left behind a video will stating that whoever can find a specific easter egg in the virtual world will receive his enormous fortune. Wade Watts is a "Gunter"––slang for an "egg hunter," that is, a person who has been determinedly searching for the hidden easter egg since Halliday's death. It's been years since Halliday's death, and most people have given up the search. But just when everyone is starting to believe the egg is impossible to find, Wade finds the first clue. Suddenly, thousands of competitors are picking up the search again––and some of them are willing to commit real-life murder in order to get to the egg first. As I said, this wasn't the type of book I would normally pick up. I mean … it's pretty darn nerdy. And I'm not really a video game nerd. I'm sure that gamers could find more to relate to in this book than I could. However, I was still able to find the world-building very interesting. I know a lot of people have complained that this book is full of info-dumps … and, well, that is true. A lot of space is taken up by Wade just explaining how the OASIS works and all the details of it and whatnot. I normally loathe info dumps, but in the case of this book I actually didn't mind it that much. It could get dull at points, but in general it managed to hold my attention even if there was more explanation than action going on. I really liked the details of the OASIS; obviously Ernest Cline had given it a tremendous amount of thought, and it showed. It was easy to imagine what the OASIS was like.Probably the most original and amusing part of the OASIS is that it's full of 80s references––since James Halliday was obsessed with the 80s and therefore inserted a lot of 80s references into his virtual reality world. I wasn't alive yet during the 80s––however, I've seen enough movies from the decade that I was able to catch a good deal of the references anyway. I liked the characters, for the most part. Wade is funny––kind of conceited and annoying at times, but likable most of the time. His main competitors are also really cool characters, especially Aech and Art3mis. I totally saw it coming that Aech was a girl. However, I didn't see it coming that she was also a black lesbian. So … that was cool. :)I also really liked the romance between Wade and Art3mis. It felt realistic, and it was really sweet … especially the ending. It occurred to me then that for the first time in as long as I could remember, I had absolutely no desire to log back into the OASIS. D'aww!I think this book risked being just totally nerdy in the shallow type of way. That is, it could have just been like "AW YEAH, VIDEO GAMES ARE AWESOME. WOOHOO. EXPLOSIONS AND SHIT." But ultimately, the message of the book is more like, "You know, video games are cool, but real life is also important." And I thought that was very significant.Like this bittersweet speech Halliday gives: “I created the OASIS because I never felt at home in the real world. I didn't know how to connect with the people there. I was afraid, for all of my life, right up until I knew it was ending. That was when I realized, as terrifying and painful as reality can be, it's also the only place where you can find true happiness. Because reality is real.”Over all, I thought this book was a lot of fun to read. The further I got into it, the more invested in the story and characters I became. And in the end, I found it to be more touching and thought-provoking than I expected it would be. Good stuff.

Update (6/18/13): OMG there's a cover. It's beautimous. Also WHAT'S THIS? A GIVEAWAY? Oh please let me win a copy of this. That would make my life.----------Okay, I am such a nerd for The Room that I've known about this book for months. I really can't wait. And it comes out on my birthday, too. FUCK YES. Ah, The Room. Such a glorious piece of cinema.If you haven't seen this movie, just ... watch it. There is nothing like it. Is it the "Greatest Bad Movie Ever Made"? Hmm well I don't know about that. It's hard to rival the equally wonderful "Troll 2." Anyway, I'm very curious to see what Greg Sestero has to say about this movie ... especially because everything Tommy Wiseau says about the movie is impossible to understand. Mostly all he says about it are things like this:And he totally avoids answering any questions about it. So yeah.HOORAY, MARK.At the end of this book I will probably say:Haha okay, I'm done now.

Thank you NetGalley for providing me with an ARC of this book!Actual rating: 4.5 StarsWARNING: Contains spoilers from the first book, The Immortal Rules, and will also contain minor spoilers for this book as well."You will always be a monster––there is no turning back from it. But what kind of monster you become is entirely up to you."In the second Blood of Eden book, we find our protagonist, Allie, on a journey to find Kanin, her sire (that is, the vampire who turned her into a vampire). She has left Zeke behind in Eden––the safe haven for humans in a vampire-infested world––and realizes that she will probably never see him again. On her quest, Allie makes an unexpected ally out of someone she thought was her enemy. And soon, her quest becomes more than a search for Kanin––but also for a potential cure for the Red Death.The Immortal Rules was a very pleasant surprise for me; I was expecting another clichéd vampire/romance/dystopian story, and was happy to instead become wrapped up in a much darker, more action-packed story than I expected. The romance was a bit corny, but otherwise I found it to be a solid start to a series, and as soon as I finished it I was already dying for the sequel.So, when this book became available on NetGalley I requested it straightaway. And the next day when I checked my email and saw my request had been approved, I squealed out loud. Literally. I squealed. It was this moment of like, "OH MY GOD. I HAVE IT. I … I CAN READ IT RIGHT NOW."Of course, sequels always make me a bit nervous, and they always come with a fear that the author won't be able to meet my expectations––but in this case, I thought Julie Kagawa delivered.A lot of what I liked about the first book was still apparent in the second; it was fast-paced and exciting (in the second half, anyway … the beginning was a tad slow), Allie was a badass, it was terrifying and violent … yay!I thought that, in terms of character development, this installment did really well. Allie has become steadily more badass, and also we see her struggling between her past (human) life and her new (vampire) life. She does fall in love and whatnot, but romance doesn't stop her from doing what she has to do, either––and I think that's a very admirable trait that I'd like to see in more YA heroines. I was glad that Kanin returned in this one. It made me sad when he was only in the beginning of the first book, because I thought he seemed like a really cool character. When at the very end of the first book Allie was like, "Oh no, I have to go find Kanin!" I was like "AW YEAH MOTHERFUCKER" because I knew that meant he would (most likely) become a more important character in the second book … and I was right!So, Kanin did become a more prominent character in this book, and he was a total BAMF. But not only that, but I liked that his more sensitive side came out as well. It was nice to see that he really cared about Allie (and vice versa) because I don't think that was quite as apparent in the first book. In this one, we could really see that the two of them are very important to each other and that there's a very interesting and powerful dynamic between them. Their reunion scene was more intense and emotional than I expected. Oh man, I didn't expect it to get to me so much, but I was like …It was so great.I was also happy to see Jackal become a more interesting character. In The Immortal Rules he seemed like such a two-dimensional villain … and honestly, I barely remembered anything about him. But in The Eternity Cure, his backstory and motivations become a lot clearer––not only that, but his personality really comes out. He's pretty damn annoying really, and at first I hated him … but after a while he grew on me, and I really liked him by the end of the book.Spoilers about two other characters:I didn't see Stick's betrayal coming … and I guess that's because he was such a minor character in the first book. I still think he could have been a much more interesting character, but I was at least glad to see him come back again.As for Zeke … honestly, part of me was a little pissed off that he was in this book at all. When Allie left him behind in Eden, at the end of the first book, I was kind of glad in a way. I was excited to see Allie set off on her own and become a more independent character. And while I still think she's quite independent, it annoyed me a little to have Zeke tagging along behind her. It also seemed a bit too convenient that they ran into each other to begin with. Also, as a character, I just don't find him that compelling. He's kind of a Gary Stu. I mean … in this book he was like freaking dying for most of it and he'd just be like, "Oh no, oh don't worry about me, I'm fine! *HACK HACK COUGH COUGH* Don't mind me, coughing up blood." So yeah, I just don't find him to be particularly interesting or believable. Maybe he'll get more interesting in the third book.Oh yeah, I'm also glad that there wasn't a love triangle in this book. I was kind of starting to fear something would happen involving Kanin or even Jackal, but fortunately … no. So, I'm glad it hasn't gone down that clichéd route (at least, not yet).So, over all, I thought this was a very strong sequel––exciting, compelling, and with some great character development. I'm eagerly awaiting the third book!--------------------Now! I just wanted to rant about the cover art for a minute.There was a lot of controversy over the cover of the first book. Basically, Allie is supposed to be of Asian descent, and a girl who appeared to be Caucasian was displayed on the cover of The Immortal Rules––not to assume anything about the model's race, but … she just looked very not-Asian to me, and I soon saw in a lot of other reviews that other people had noticed this and were angered by it:I was really hoping that the publisher would apologize for this, and that an Asian girl would appear on the cover of the second book. I was also hoping that, when a paperback version of the first book came out, the model's ethnicity would be changed. Instead, when the paperback came out, and the second book came out, these were the new covers:Julie Kagawa wrote a post about this fiasco on her blog. She claims that apparently the publisher thought these covers look "more dystopian" and that the cover for the first book was changed because it was misleading readers into thinking it was just a typical vampire romance, etc. And okay, I sort of see a point there, because I did think the first cover made it look a lot cornier. But it still seemed to me like they were maybe avoiding putting an Asian person on the cover of their book. So I'm like, "Oh, maybe I'm just being paranoid …" But if you read further into that above blog post, Kagawa says:"Also, a new cover model was chosen, one who correctly represents Allie, and will either appear on the back of the cover, or on the inside flap."ON THE BACK OF THE COVER, OR ON THE INSIDE FLAP???!!!Are. You. Fucking. Kidding. Me. When have you ever picked up a book where the main character was only depicted on the back of the cover (and does that mean on the back of the book, or does that literally mean her face is hidden on the inside of the dust jacket?) or on the inside flap? Because I can never think of a time I have ever seen that on a book … ever. Ever.So, I'm pretty sure I'm not just being paranoid here. The publisher is obviously avoiding showing an Asian girl on the front cover of their book. And frankly, that disgusts me. It really does. Well, that's about all I've got to say on that matter. I love these books, but the cover art really pisses me off.

Actual rating: 1.5 starsWhen I was assigned to read this book, I was told that it was a book about werewolves written in verse. Immediately, I knew that this concept could either be really cool or be really pretentious and annoying. Unfortunately, it was the latter for me.Usually when I dislike a book, I can still kind of understand why it appeals to people. This is one of the few books that, no matter how many positive reviews of it I read, I just … don't really get it, to be honest. It's not the most terrible thing I've ever read, but for me it had few redeeming qualities.First of all, I didn't like the writing in verse. (For some reason, I always think I'm going to enjoy novels written in verse, and I almost never do.) There were some instances in which it worked … The book explores themes about thinking like a human vs. thinking like an animal, and I think the writing in poetry sometimes conveyed a more "animalistic" point of view. But for the most part it was just unnecessary and gimmicky. It could have been written in prose and it would have been the same book, in my opinion. And the writing style itself, regardless of whether or not it was written in poetry … I just didn't care for it. I found it to be pretentious. Secondly, I felt no attachment whatsoever to any of the characters. There were too many characters and points of view to keep track of, and on top of that I found the characters to be so bland that I couldn't distinguish them from each other in the first place. Basically they were all assholes and I just didn't sympathize with any of them. Thirdly, the plot dragged a lot in my opinion. There just wasn't very much substance to it. It was kind of like … there are two wolf packs and they hate each other, and they all try to kill each other. And there's some sex here and there. It was one of those books where I thought I was almost done with it and then realized I was only like halfway through and it was like … Oh geez, I can't take it for that much longer. It felt to me like the author was trying to get some kind of movie deal out of the book, hence it was too focused on violence and sex and not really anything else. Lastly, this book really offended me. I would have still disliked the book, but the fact that it was both racist and sexist on a number of occasions really did not help.To begin with, the female characters are so insubstantial that it's just … disgusting. They have this thing going on in the wolf packs where it will be all men and one woman that all the men have sex with. And yes, they actually refer to this woman as "the bitch." On top of that, of the several female characters who were taken in by the wolf packs, at least two of them (if I recall correctly) had been sexually and/or physically abused in the past … and becoming part of the pack was portrayed as a way of "rescuing" them. Basically, the female characters were only there for sexual purposes. The author kept stressing the importance of the wolf packs having a female to "hold them together" or some shit like that … but really, the female characters had no personality and all they ever did was use their sexuality to get what they wanted––and with the addition of the author always referring to them as "girls" and "bitches" it was just horribly sexist in my opinion.Oh yeah, I'd also like to mention that the most major female character didn't even have a name. There were like a billion characters in the story, most of them male, and the one lead female character didn't even deserve a fucking name, apparently.Okay, I rest my case.But there's more! On top of being sexist, this book was also racist! Woohoo!Just a few examples: a "turbaned Indian" running a gas station, two men described as being "a man and a Samoan" (um, so the Samoan man isn't a man apparently?), and some horribly bad Spanish that even Google Translate would be ashamed of (ex: "puta de hijo" means "bitch of a son." I believe you meant "hijo de puta" which means "son of a bitch." Seriously, plugging this into a simple translator would have taken like two seconds. Just … do your research.)That's about all I have to say. I did not care for the book. The end.